I won. I mean, my team won. But really, I won.
I EFFING WON.
and I’m nervous about it because it’s for work … and I really want to win because I’m competitive when it comes to these types of things … but no one else on my team likes to cook … and my boss is one of the judges … and sometimes I pretend to know a lot about food, even though I’ve only learned from watching Food Network and such … and I swear to Christ, if I lose, I’m blaming my team … Oh, and a member of my team is a Vice President … and they all think I can cook … but what if I can’t? … and what if the secret ingredient is anchovies or cow tongue or turnips? … oh geez … I’m hyperventilating over a team-building event …
so shutup. Just allow me to bask in the possibility she thinks her dad is a funny and charming guy.
BARE skin condoms. As in, it feels like your bare skin.
Not BEAR-skin condoms. As in, a condom made from the skin of a bear.
It was early. I think the coffee has finally kicked in. I got it now.
But seriously, though. Bear Skin Condoms. That’d be a great name. TRADEMARKED!